Thirteen Weird But True

1. He used to shave in the dark, but he’s got a beard now.

2. The traffic island on the corner of his street keeps changing size, expanding until he finally hits it.

3. Every cloud looks exactly like every other cloud to him, and they all look like big fluffy bunnies.

4. Regardless of what he’s reading, page 34 always demands to be read three times.

5. Even though everyone tells him Panthera leo is king, he secretly worships at the altar of Alces alces.

6. When he cracks eggs in the morning, he can hear starving children screaming in Somalia.

7. His car radio controls the universe.

8. He’s afraid to go to sleep at night because he thinks the day will end and he’ll have to start all over again on a new one.

9. When he has nightmares, he knows he’s having them but he’s afraid to wake up anyway.

10. He blows and blows, but it never goes away.

11. He believes that all the crows he’s ever seen belong to the same band of fifty or sixty crows that have followed him around his whole life.

12. All of his mail consists of self-addressed envelopes, mailed to him by his alternate personalities, most of whom he has never met.

13. No matter how he translates it, it still makes perfect sense.

Poets and Storytellers United
Weekly Scribble #86
~ Mining The Journals ~

poets and storytell

7 thoughts on “Thirteen Weird But True

  1. Love it…LOL..My favourite is having to read page 34 a few times no matter what you are reading…I think you are heading for some very interesting senior moments. That is the pc term for old age. Still chortlng away here.

  2. #11 is not true. Part of them are MY crows!! I want to read Page 34, and found this poem enchanting in its entirety!

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