Status Quo

There I was again in that same ruined acropolis of
semisleep at almost four, unable to either breathe or
stop breathing, shamed by both my missing vision
and my total inability. There I was without you,
without even a fragment, in a darkened cell without
a phone and without a clue, without a map or even a
sense of direction.
………………………And playing the usual lullabies
or reciting the list of four-syllable words, even the
made-up ones, was no help; even wrapping myself
under the usually comforting layers of white fleece.
Nothing would turn the invisible switch; nothing
would put an end to the sad, interminable wait for
whatever I have fooled myself into expecting, given
the history of what I usually fail to create.
…………………………………………………..And even
if I could, even if I could somehow capture bliss
—or even if I could only sleep—none of it would matter
without you here to share it with me tonight.

One thought on “Status Quo

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