Robots We Could Live Without

My Beloved Sandra recently suggested that, now that we have no carpets, now that we’re never home to find them underfoot, now that we have far less dust than we ever dreamed of when we lived on Duck Pond Road, we might think about getting one of those robotic vacuums one sets and forgets as it goes about its business while you’re away, aimlessly wandering your living room until it encounters a wall here, a chair leg there, then randomly turns itself away at some otherwise haphazard angle in search of another speck of dust under the easy chair, the last lost grain of rice fallen from the dining room table, the shed beard hair, the wayward chest hair, the tail of the tab from a spiral notebook the poet has torn out in disgust, unable to net the sonnet’s final couplet, which would, had he been able to do so, have catapulted him into the pantheon of the masters.

No,” I said. “Nice try, but no. I’ll vacuum on Sunday.” Ick.

3 thoughts on “Robots We Could Live Without

  1. actually they’re kinda fun to watch. My husband’s aunt had one and it used to put her in hysterics as it trundled around, beeping and booping…

    Look at it this way. She indulges you as far as your music is concerned. flutes, drums, pipes, whatever. GIVE a little. =)

    If this place wasnt such a warren of surprises id probably have one myself, but the idea of a Roomba stuck in front of what’s left of a dead mouse, or chasing spiders around the room…oh, wait, that one sounds like fun…

  2. We have enough Science Fiction in our lives. But I might agree to an automated maid if it looked like Mickey Mouse in the Sorcerer’s Apprentice.

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